30 Lessons I’m Grateful I Learned by Age 30

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OK, IMMEDIATE CONFESSION: I’M ACTUALLY 31. BUT THESE ARE THE LESSONS THAT MOST INFORMED MY FIRST 30 YEARS {AND CONTINUE TO GUIDE ME TODAY}.
YOU MAY SEE A THEME SURROUNDING SELF LOVE. THAT’S BECAUSE IT’S THEMAGIC THAT MAKES EVERYTHING ELSE WORK.
I’VE ALSO LEARNED ABOUT MY NATURE AS A SPIRITUAL BEING, TWO WORDS THAT DIDN’T MEAN ANYTHING TO ME LESS THAN SEVEN YEARS AGO. BUT I WAS ALSO A RAGING ALCOHOLIC THEN. LUCKILY, OUR EXTERNAL CIRCUMSTANCES CHANGE IN ACCORDANCE WITH OUR LEVEL OF AWARENESS + THE INNER WORKWE DO.
GETTING SOBER WAS JUST THE BEGINNING. MY LIFE REALLY BEGAN TO CHANGE WHEN I CAME TO SEE MYSELF AS A POWERFUL CO-CREATOR; NOT A VICTIM OF CIRCUMSTANCE OR EVEN MY OWN SELF-SABOTAGE BUT THE CHIEF MOLDER OF MY WORLD. I CAME TO UNDERSTAND HOW MY BELIEFS WERE CONTRIBUTING TO MY DAILY REALITY, MY DAILY MISERY. MORE IMPORTANT, I BEGAN TO GET COZY WITH THE FEELINGS UNDERLYING THOSE BELIEFS.

I’m not smart enough, capable enough, pretty enough… fill in the blank.

It’s not safe to feel this way. I’m not allowed to hurt.

I don’t deserve to be heard. I’m not worthy of healthy relationships. 

I GUESS THAT’S WHY I CONTINUE TO EXAMINE MY THINKING TODAY + MAKE LISTS LIKE THIS. IT’S BOTH A PROCESS OF INFLUENCING CHANGE AND UNDERSTAND WHERE I’M AT, BECAUSE I KNOW BETTER THAN MOST: THE JOURNEY FROM HEAD TO HEART CAN BE A TREACHEROUS ONE.
SO DARLINGS, MAKE YOUR OWN LIST, LEARN FROM MINE AND DON’T BEAT YOURSELF UP IF IT TAKES SOME TIME BETWEEN KNOWING WHAT NEEDS DOING AND HAVING THE STRENGTH TO DO IT. THERE ARE NO SHORT-CUTS ON THE ROAD TO SELF LOVE. YOU’VE GOTTA DO THE BEAUTIFUL MESSY WORK.
AND IF WE CAN LEARN A BIT FROM ONE ANOTHER ALONG THE WAY, WELL, THAT’S THE MAKINGS OF REAL WISDOM.
  1. Heartbreak happens to break us wide open and allow more love into our lives, namely our own.

  2. Addiction arises out of an inability to safely feel and express our emotions. Sobriety requires us, above all, that we begin to listen to, trust and ultimately, love ourselves.

  3. If we’re disconnected from ourselves, we will be disconnected from our environment too. But return to nature and you begin to get back to yourself.

  4. It’s only in exploring our shadows that we begin to see our ineffable light.

  5. Comparing yourself to others and seeking approval outside one’s self is not only pointless; it can be terribly depressing.

  6. Happiness is hard work and it happens outside our comfort zone.

  7. There are no accidents and no experience is wasted. Not one.

  8. We are all infinitely powerful creators and it’s only our limited beliefs that hold us back.

  9. A safe, loving and supportive community is crucial to our long-term well-being.

  10. There’s nothing to get about GOD and no right way to pray.

  11. Our heart-centered presence is the greatest gift we can give ourselves and those we love.

  12. Pain is the most poignant teacher, so long as we’re open to the lesson.

  13. There’s no such thing as perfect and we have only our own standards to meet.

  14. You can’t eat crap food and feel good.

  15. Getting up early is overrated. Savor every moment of rest you can, while you can!

  16. The ability to laugh at yourself will save your ass on numerous occasions.

  17. Real love— the messy, vulnerable, honest, complicated variety— requireswe get intimate with and love ourselves first.

  18. Praying for patience only brings endless irritation. Proceed with caution.

  19. Sometimes the best thing we can do is absolutely nothing.

  20. Gratitude is the greatest reset.

  21. Meditation is not just about sitting crossed leg with our eyes shut. It’s any activity we wholeheartedly commit to with complete presence andsingleness of focus.

  22. Religion does not denote spirituality just as a spiritual life doesn’t need to be lived under the guise of religion. Or even a god.

  23. Peace begins when we start listening to ourselves without judgment.

  24. It’s only when get in touch with our most tender selves that we can access the fullness of who we are, our precious divinity.

  25. You don’t have to do anything. You always, always have a choice and the right to change your mind.

  26. Travel is the best drug.

  27. Good sex is a close second.

  28. Mother earth is the ultimate healer.

  29. Free thinkers are infinitely more interesting to be around… not to mention sexy.

  30. Destruction is vital to the creative process. And it’s always hardest right before the breakthrough.

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